still have arthritis...

I still have arthritis today, but it's more bearable than yesterday. I don't even have to drink pain relievers today. I tweet about this all the time, that yesterday, someone replied to my tweet about using Glutathione for my arthritis. Maybe I will give it a try but I have a lot of research to do before I actually try it. I don't want to make myself worst by just popping a pill without knowing. I learned from my Aleve experience. It was so painful, I don't even know what was wrong with me. I went to the emergency room for that. I even have to miss work!! UGH. I paid for not reading the disclaimers. Which I usually do.

Oh well, another day... maybe tomorrow I won't have arthritis.

Worse than yesterday...

Today is worse that what i have been feeling yesterday. I don't think i can even type properly. It hurts my fingers so much. I think i need to sleep in a temperature controlled room. The cold and the hot is not doing my arthritis any better. I think i am pregnant too.. but then, i always think about that all the time. LOL. Maybe, I'm about to have my period. Lupus is very hormonal too. The closer i get to my period, the worst or best i feel. Last time it was the best time, i feel no arthritis or what-so-ever.
I wish i will be better...I have really painful arthritis today. I took pain reliever (Tylenol) i get allergies from aleve since i drank steroids...

today... 07/26/2011

Unfortunately, today is not different from yesterday. I have this nagging feeling to cry, curl up in the corner and let the earth swallow me whole. But I, myself can't do that. I am to proud to cry at work. And i know the earth can't swallow me whole, it could only make me decompose slowly.

My hands and elbows still hurt.
I have new sores on my skin, it's not that bad, i put cortisone cream on it.
My face doesn't show new rashes building, but i keep scratching the scabs behind my ear (i need to learn to stop myself from doing that)
my nails aren't getting any better
i feel a few pain on my kidney or uterus, i thing i need to have myself a urinalysis just to be on the safe side.

oh well, lupus, i have you not you have me. Which means without me, you don't exist. i',m stronger than you.

...

Sometimes, I close my eyes, hope everything will be fine when i opened them. But that never happens.
I screw up. That's it. And that will be the start of the story...

I have Lupus. I am sick, but I am strong. I can do this.

It's been a while...

It has been a while since the last time I wrote in this blog. Sometimes I tend to be  to preoccupied by tweeting. It's easier, less time consuming and just random. But then I realize, blog tells a story. A continues train of thought, not just random ramblings. I need more time to focus my thought. I need time for me.