The Past Month

I know.. I know... It has been a while...  But there is nothing really nice to talk about...

What did I do this past month?

I just had a scare of my life before thanksgiving.

I had really shortness of breathe and I thought maybe I am just way too fat. But my weight had been constant for the past months that I have been put on steroids. And I should be losing weight now since I am off of it. It wasn't a really big deal but gradually as weeks pass by, I can't even climb the stairs to my apartment. Which was fairly short. I got scared of having the possibility of water in the sac around my lungs. I know it could happen with anyone with lupus. But I was hoping it wouldn't happen to me.

After a few days I have an appointment with my doctor. She advised me that I should, if it ever happens again, that I can't breathe, to go to the ER,  as a precaution. I know I should have. But I thought, I'm going to see her anyway.

And as a precaution, they sent me to the lab so they could take my EKG. EKG came back normal. So they, my rheumatology doctor and the head rheumatology doctor of the hospital, wanted to do a lot of different exams so they could be sure of what is happening to me.

They would want another EKG, an X-ray and an ultrasound of my chest cavity. So, they sent me to the ER.

That ER experience was the worst experience I ever had with any ER. And the worst part of it is what I learned afterwards.

I was wheeled into the ER, from the Out Patient Clinic to the ER, which is fairly far when you are being wheeled. So I got to the ER, to the triage, told the nurse that I was sent here from the rheumatology clinic to see a certain doctor. Got my papers printed out with the doctors name, so that I could take the exam and go. But no one listened. Not a single one if them. Since I wasn't able to take the tests my doctors wanted, they made an appointment for me after one day. Yes, I went to my doctors appointment twice in a week. The head doctor insisted that I do so. I was seen by the doctor who was suppose to see me in the ER and asked me what happened. He told me he went to the ER and looked for me twice. I told him I was there from the time they wheeled me in until 7 at night. He was expecting me to be on one of the beds, which they didn't let me even though I told them I was suppose to meet a doctor their that my rheumies already talked to. The ER nurse told me that they are of different department and since all my vitals are normal, I am nor in eminent danger of dying any moment soon. And here I quote what she said, "you may be waiting for 30 hours and you won't die" My dear friends, specially to the people who aim to be nurses or are nurses, your purpose in the hospital is to help people feel better, may it psychologically or physically, but this kind of remark won't make anyone, even if they are not dying, feel bad. Your words are the only thing that could actually make us, patients, feel better, in any condition we may be in. You may be tired and over worked, but we are in pain, and remarks like this are not tolerable, not even if you have an excuse.

I told my doctor about this, and they are surprised that this happened to me, when earlier in the week, they did that same thing and it was done in less than 5 hours. I guess, I was the lucky one. 

The following appointment, I was seen very early due of a special request, and was seen, taken lab and exams. Everything is normal. They said it was probably due to my removal from Prednisone that caused this.

I am currently on 5mg of Prednisone, which I am doing fine with. And will be weaned off of it soon, I hope. I guess I am more stressed than usual. I have personal problems that I have to deal with too you know. But other than that, all is well. 

I do hope you guys had an awesome Thanksgiving. I had, with family and friends. We had  20 lbs turkey! a 15 lbs ham, mash potatoes, corn on cob and pumpkin pie! :)

This is basically my past month. And I hope I will be able to write on this blog soon. A bit busy recently, the holidays are coming, and I just moved to a new apartment. :)

My EKG, which is normal.

LUPUS...

You have greater chances of having Lupus or any autoimmune disease when one in your family or relatives has it.

Sucks... my sister has it too... I got SLE, she has nephritis. Why Lupus??? Why?

My Baby...

Check out my baby, Sable!

My little artworks

One day I decided to get my creativity back... and so far, this is all that i could do...

Rose - in pencil

sunset - oil paint

Tried drawing in pen... I said I tried... :)

I lost count... No steroids and the effects...

I am not sure how long I have not been using Prednisone, but i am quite sure there has been a lot of changes already...

Recently, I have been having hives on my face.. Like it's a row of swollen patch of skin which I do not know the reason. I am allergic to a bunch of stuff, but I have been avoiding them for a long time, it's mostly food so I do not know what happened here.

I also have been having a bunch of pimple on my face. Like little nasty red ones, that has pus on the tip. There are little, so it's not really that nasty, but it's still pimples!!!! Not A pimple, but pimples!!

When I wasn't yet fully diagnosed with Lupus, I usually have this pain on my right foot. Maybe because I walk lazy or my steps are weird, but it's only the right one, on a specific spot. I think I have a tear or two by my middle foot arch, but it's posed no problem until a few months before I had my Lupus. But now it's back. I am not sure if it is because of my lupus, I will tell my doctor on my next appointment.

I have been feeling weird lately, I feel really depressed most of the time. Like depressed. It's a feeling of hopelessness that I have never felt before. I mean I do have my ups and down, but it's not like this. Maybe I am impatient, maybe. I don't know, I think I really need to be checked. Physically and mentally.

Oh well... My life has been a constant struggle. Just wish me luck.

Steroids free for 3 days...

My doctor advised me to stop taking steroids (Prednisone) after taking half of a 5mg pill for a week.

So, the first time that I took half a pill, my body was feeling a little bit achy... maybe because it is also around the time that I should be getting my period, but since I am in Depo, I wasn't having it, and my body, was just in turmoil. So I need to go back to a week of drinking a whole pill like I used to.

 I did went back to a whole 5mg pill for a work, and the week after I went to the half pill that was advised by my new doctor (My former doctor is already done with her internship, I assumed), and I did the half pill for a week.

Today marks the 3rd day of my "no steroids" day. I think I will stop counting when I lost track of it. There aren't many or major changes that happened. I notice that my fingers at the moment, 09/19/12 1:30pm, that my fingers on my right hand, only the pointer and middle finger, is a bit swollen on the first joints. My right foot, just a few inches from the ball of my feet, is hurting since last week, and I don't think it is part of the "no steroids" side effects. But if it become unbearable, I will drink ibuprofen. But hopefully, it's just caused I wore slippers too much the past month.

I am happy, that right now, I am on my way to better health and hopefully, will be able to have my baby soon... :) I am old you know, and my biological clock is ticking, and my baby envy at full mode!

But as for now... Yey!! One less pill a day!!!

Depo Provera.. OUCH!

Maybe I haven't done enough research regarding this contraceptive.
Maybe I should have followed what the doctor advised me to get.
There are just some questions, I guessed, that I forgot to ask when I was at the doctor's office.

I have been on Depo Provera for about a month. And I do not actually have much of the side effect. Except for one, and I am not even sure if it is because of the medicines I am taking or it's just me.
It hurts, when I am having intercourse.

It feels full inside. Like there are so much stuff in there that it is painful.
I have read a lot of stories about painful sex because of  Depo Provera, but I think some of them are just exaggerating.

***a week after

So I had my spotting, and actually had a day of having a period, well like the last day of your period, where it is too little to wear a pad and a bit too much to wear only pantyliner. And after that, I am feeling less pain in the belly. and it feels less painful having intercourse.

Maybe coz my body is just new to this hormone shot I have. Looks like I am actually ok with this depo provera thing. Hopefully I don't have to take it long. And won't take long to have a baby after my treatment. :)

Wish me luck. And I hope the other lupies are feeling as hopeful as I am today.

A lot of firsts.. Family Planning appointment..

I wasn't actually very excited or even planned to get a birth control. No, I am not against it; in fact I am actually for it but never really thought it will be for me. I am 28 years old, going 29 in January. I want to have babies. And birth control won't help achieving that.

Unfortunately, I was struck by sickness at my prime baby years. I was suppose, or was planning to get knocked up now that I am 28, since we had a go signal to the possible grandmother-to-be that she could be a granny by the time she is 40. She is now 40. But I can't have my baby. Not just yet.

Yesterday, I went to my very first family planning appointment. Got my no no parts checked. My boobs checked for lumps. I even had a paps smear. My nursing aid or what ever she was, was amazing! She was very gentle, very warm and welcoming. I am ticklish so I laughed when she touched my breast. I laughed when she touched my inner thigh when she checked it for lumps as well. I laughed when she checked my abdomen. And she said sorry all the time. Lady, I was laughing, I wasn't crying.

The lady also did a paps smear, hopefully it comes back normal. I don't need another sickness at the moment. My body have enough. It's hard you know. Not being able to do what you want to do because you are feeling bad. Or you want to try out something and you can't because it's not advisable. I want to go somewhere but I can't because of almost every other week of doctors appointment. Oh well.

I was able to get my contraceptive. I got Depo-Provera, which a shot that I am suppose to get every 12 weeks. Although my doctor advised that I either get IUD or an implant, the family planning center usually lets the patient try out first time patients the type of contraceptive they would prefer. Since I prefered shots that's the one they gave me.

I hope I won't gain weight because of the shots. I will be trying so hard to eat healthy. Need to get in a gym soon.

Wish me luck. Will add more information soon...

Seborrheic Dermatitis - UPDATE!

Most of it are gone... :) I just need to stop picking on the one by my hairline... But as you can see, the one in the middle of my forehead is gone, by my eyebrows are gone... :)

After at least 6  months of treatment... :) YEY!!!

Missed Appointment...

I didn't mean to, I am not really aware that I missed one. Until I asked one of the nurses at my Dermatology clinic if I could have a list of my upcoming appointment.

And there is was... Missed appointment(s)... and I was puzzled...

You know what's worst? It's my rheumatology appointment. It's the most important doctor's appointment. She's the one who usually gives and see's over all my medications. My primary doctor is the one who checks that she didn't missed anything or possible better treatment options. But she is good, my rheumatologist, she actually got everything covered. AND I MISSED AN APPOINTMENT!!! and I didn't found out about it, until few weeks ago. I missed an appointment and realized it after 2 months!!!!

:(

I need someone to help me with this appointment things.. :(

It's been a while... 06/14/12

Since I have wrote something..
I have been a bit busy lately... :) for a change...

Friday, me my baby decided to go out for sushi... which is really awesome and was surprised that we only spend 30 dollars to eat. And we are full!!! :) You guys should drop by Tenno Sushi, and don't forget to try their awesome tempura rolls...

Remembered to take a picture before we finished it.
Top to bottom: Salmon roll, california roll, california tempura rolls

Awesome skyline of Downtown LA, view from Little Tokyo

And my Baby, pointing at a street sign with his name on it... :)

Also, I was able to go deep sea fishing for the first time!!!! :) Didn't fish tho, but I did go on the speed boat and was able to ride and jump thru the waves... :) Loved it, except that they don't have pee pee spots for women, while my boyfriend and his male relatives just points towards the other direction, away from me, and pee away... :/ need to bring diapers next time. And i will!!! :)

And yes, I wear sunblock. 100spf, twice!! :) think it worked, for I do not have sunburn only just a bit.. :) but i also covered myself in black jacket and a cap.

Light House by Cabrillo Beach in San Pedro "Angel's Gate Light"

Look! They have a pet boat!! :)

Picky pelican, didn't want to eat ghost shrimps..

I also was able to finish reading the 50 shades trilogy. I suggest this have a mature rating, and would not be sold to people 21 and below. LOL.

although, there is a hype and it being a best seller... as a book, its not nice. As an erotica , hell yeah!! LOL

On a less happy note, I missed a doctor's appointment. And it is not my fault. I was suppose to go a family planning appointment, but I guess all that bouncing on my little speed boat ride was too much for my poor uterus. I bled earlier that suppose to. oh well, so they scheduled me next month. Man, I need those damn contraceptives!! My doctors won't give me anything stronger than what I am already getting until I get those. The earlier I am out of the Lupy flare up the earlier I will be able to have a baby... :/

I had plans, and then I got Lupus... c'est la vie...

Hair Loss...

Just read this article from Lupus Now, regarding hair loss... I thank God every time when I see my hair is growing back... Slowly, but it is growing back...

Read about Lupus and hair loss in this article.

Be strong my Lupies... :) We can definitely do it... :)

*** http://www.lupus.org/webmodules/webarticlesnet/templates/new_magazinehome.aspx

When will we find a cure?

Sometimes, I want to cry... Just cry and cry and cry... Wish it was all over...
It hurts you know, knowing you won't get better. That there is no cure.

I was at the peak of my life. I was about to get my life on track. And then this?!? I don't know if I should get angry at myself... Or who I should get angry to... Who's fault why I have this?

I have lupus. No one knows why or how people get it. No one knows how to get rid of it for good. All they know is how to treat the current pains and conditions. Which, I would have thought they should have known by now. We got technology that never existed before. Why are we still in the dark about a disease they found half a century ago.

Sometimes, I just want this all to end. To never wake up and stop being in pain. To stop being a burden. A burden to myself and to all the people I love.

I am one of those people who wants to be normal. I am one of those who wants to have a family of their own. I'm one of those people who is waiting to have a cure.

When will we find a cure?

The wait is over.. :)

IT'S FINALLY HERE!!!

Will be a gaming blog for a few posts.. :) just enjoying my game..

100th post - My Latest Lab & Doctor Appointment

I haven't actually wrote anything for so long, because there is nothing new to really to write about. But I know, some of you want to know updates regarding the status of my health.

So here it is... I am getting better.

They, my doctors, think I am on my way.. but of course there is a lot of thing they have to check before they would say I am in a good condition. :) I want to have my babies soon you know.

So last May 4th, I went to my Lab appointment. They took only 2 vials of blood, which means they will be doing only 2 types of test. The thing is, I have to fast for at least 14 hours. I think I ate something bad that didn't quite settle. I ate 2 chicken tamales, and drank 1 ice blend coffee from CBTL. I guess that was a bad call anyway, but I have the biggest craving for a frappe. :)

 Since I haven't ate that much, and was also having side pains, maybe coz I TRIED to exercise but didn't quite follow thru, I puked water the next morning.. My poor baby love couldn't do anything but look at me. But I was alright, it's just a bad choice of food before fasting.

I went to my lab, get my blood work.. drank so much water but they didn't even take urine.. LOL

This is where they took blood, it bruised after 2 days
Which is not a good thing, means the person who took it
is not really that good.

When I get there on my actual appointment date, i just waited and waited and waited. And when my doctor finally see me, all he did was interview me, see if my other doctors are doing something that is not good for me. I told him I am gaining weight, he said that is normal for someone on steroids; he had my blood check for cholesterol and diabetes, which I both don't have. :) He said tons of exercise but not too much.

So I do think I am getting better, well if you think that I am not, do not forget to comment. :)
I am new at this thing, and I haven't actually researched, since I am too busy thinking about what to do with my weight... Just thinking.. LOL

I found out something new too!!! :)
My primary doctor decided to have an ophthalmologist check on my eyes and also I will be having a bone density exam. Apparently, being on steroids for so long could make my bad eyesight worse, or me having a lighter bone density that I am suppose to have.

No new medicine this time, just keep drinking what I have. Will be having an appointment for contraceptives, eye check-up and bone density check. :)

So maybe after that, I might, and 100% say that I am on a road to full recovery.. :)

Wish me luck.. :D

May 10 is World Lupus Day

I don't need you to donate, but if you can please do... today is World Lupus Day.
Help us find a cure, and help us raise awareness.

Thank you and have a nice day...

BTW, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO ALL MOTHERS IN MEXICO, AND CENTRAL AMERICA! i think... but for sure mexico.. :D

My monthly pains...

It's not really fun to have a monthly period... to both women, and men with women... :)

The PMS, the cramps and that yucky feeling...

But then it gets really worse when you have lupus... Seriously... I always look forward to my monthly period... Just to get over it, and of course to make sure I am not pregnant, since I am on medication that is pretty toxic for a fetus.

Monthly, around the same time as my period, pimples, joint pain on my hands, feet and shoulders, itchy, annoying rashes sprung out. it really sucks.. Like really bad. I hate it.

I can't do anything about it, just accept that it will be over soon.. and the cycle starts again.

:( i need a cure for lupus. we, the  millions of people affected with lupus, do. :((

Nick Cannon & Lupus

So Nick Cannon has Lupus. And here the first video of him battling Lupus. Which is awesome in a way since this spreads more, and will make people more aware about lupus.

But there are millions of people who have Lupus and doesn't or will not have the luxury that he is having. The ability to go to good medical centers and be able to be diagnose. I hope Nick Cannon is just not doing to this to gain fame and fortune. Well, I only know him as that guy who host or Mariah Carrey's husband. But to really promote, and see how most people with Lupus get to go by their daily life.

I feel bad for him, he has twin kids that needs his attention. I hope he will be better, and I hope his vlog have a good cause.

Get well soon to Nick Cannon, and to us who are only celebrities in our parents' eyes.. :P

Lupus and cold weather... RANDOM ramblings...

It sucks being sick, I already have Lupus and I will get sick more???
I am already taking steroids.. Which subdues my hyperactive immune system... Which is really bad during this cold and allergy season..

Weather in Los Angeles is not really helpful during this times... But I hope to be better in time for the summer season where I will be fishing and camping and doing outdoorsy stuff (**Note: Buy tons of sunblock)

I have joint pains, stuffy nose and itchy throat... it's not flu, just a random cold.

I went back to 1 pill of Prednisone because of my joint pains, now I'm not sure if my jaw is hurting becuase of a tooth, or it's just another joint pain that is caused by Lupus. The weather is pretty cold... I feel so old because of my sickness.. :( (It rhymes too)


Sometime, my little sense of humor and my boyfriend's sense of humor help me survive this kind of days. I love my baby love... :) he keeps me happy and feel loved all the time... Even when I am on the verge of breaking his head... ** LOL **

I think I am in Love! LOL...

Happy Puppy Day!!!

I love you!!!

Drinking.. Again... :P

I haven't touched alcohol for quite sometime since I have been diagnosed with lupus. I have researched about my medicines a few months ago like the things I am not suppose to do or don't do while I am taking it. And one of them is Prednisone and Alcohol.

I mean, it's not prohibited, but it would be better if you consume none of it. I do believe that everything done in moderation is ok. Like too much exercise can hurt you but too little or no exercise can hurt you too. :) But, since I am taking at least 20 mg of Prednisone in the beginning of the treatment I decide not to drink at all. :D It's an easy decision, as I am not a heavy drinker.

So last Thursday I just want to try, out of the blue, to drink. :) I choose the B&J Strawberry Daquiri. It's a wine cooler. It's basically water for me before and doesn't even make me drunk. But drinking it for the first time.. It was just weird!! :D

DAY ONE: I feel feverish. Like i feel like I am burning, literally. I asked my boyfriend if it was really hot but he said no, he also said I was red. So there I was, drunk faced but not drunk. :D after one bottle.

DAY TWO: Now day 2 is like normal day. I only drank one bottle but it just did nothing to me. I guess it was just my body wasn't really expecting alcohol. Or the other day was just the first time in months that I drank a bit of alcohol. But this day was different. No burning up, no redness, just sleepy. And that was exactly what I did.

I only did it for 2 days. I am not a drunkie and I do not expect to be one anytime soon. I am still taking Prednisone but only 5mg every day. So, I guess I could really drink once in a while, but not get drunk. I do not want additional side effects to the side effects of the medicines I am already drinking be made worst by alchohol. :)

In process...

I am going to change themes soon... so I could prepare for May... which is Lupus Awareness Month... Their colors are Gold/Yellow and Purple... How appropriate.. I live in Los Angeles and the LA Laker's colors are those... LOL.. Don't really like the Lakers, don't really hate them too... I just don't really care...

Lost interest a while back... But my MOM is a super fan!! :) weird...

AS you might have noticed, my back ground is purple... LOL.. but i am going back to what i really am... which loves black very much... so... wish i could find better backgrounds or else i will be stuck with this for a while... :D

Before and after

Notice that my skin got clearer and the disappearance of a red spot on my left eyebrow (your right).

Also, the dermatitis is becoming flat than bumpy as before. So I think my medicine is working!! :)

My plants...

Trying to make them grow in time for spring

Seborrheic Dermatitis

I am actually writing this as I wait 10 minutes before I rinse my hair. I am not in the shower ok. I do not take risks like that and ruin my perfect laptop! Alienware M11X FTW!!! But I can't wait for 10 minutes doing nothing. I can't even stand or sit still in 3 seconds... LOL ADHD?!?

I recently found out I have seborrheic dermatitis. I went to my dermatologist yesterday and they told me, although the psoriasis is not entirely on my face, you have dermatitis. I mean, I'll take dermatitis every freaking day against psoriasis. Why??? Let me tell you why.


First, what is psoriasis??
Honestly. I do not know. All I know it is an autoimmune disease as well, like lupus. You could see it as scaly and red. And the scales, just imagine Goldmember from Austin Powers. LOL
Check this link if you want to know more, after I describe it to you very thoroughly using my own words... LOL Took biology classes and this is how I describe a disease... maybe that I why I didn't finish it... Nah! I was just lazy... maybe I was just bored...


So this is what my Psoriasis looks like...

I searched for psoriasis picture on the Internet... They are so gross... LOL and mine doesn't look like that bad so I just took pictures of mine instead...



Then, What is Seborrheic dermatitis?
I think it usually occurs on hair line or something, most of what I have is on my head, by the hair line and my eyebrows.. which sucks so bad because it is on my face... :( That is my own interpretation... you could look click on this link to read about it more. I will take a picture of it sometime..

So what is their difference? I have no idea... :D I think most of the difference is where it is located and how it looks like. For example, I have some psoriasis on my knee and elbow, and I might have some that on my face as well. But some that are on my hairline might mostly be dermatitis since it mostly looking like dandruff that are oily, rather than dry and flaky like psoriasis should be. For better understanding you could look here for more information on their differences.

Update. So this is how my forehead looks like since I have sebhorrheic dermatitis. See those scaly, round blotches. That is what they are.. my doctor said so... 



  


    
 So here is now what I need to do to make what I have better. I need to upgrade my daily regimen...

L-R: Ointment for my face, oil for my hair, ointment for my body and shampoo for my hair

Having this new medication for my skin problems, which need to be soaked in for a while like the shampoo.. I need to add at least 15 minutes to my daily regimen.

These medication both helps psoriasis and dermatitis. I have been using it for 2 days and I think it has been working. So hopefully in the long run it will work... Wish me luck my loves...

Here is another picture of me... washing my hair... :) I used my tube socks so no soapy water gets in my eyes... :) It helped...

I will possibly learn more as I continue this treatment... I hope I get better soon... :D

CHECK ON THE UPDATE HERE!!!

Dermatology Appointment

I will be having my dermatology appointment this Friday, 02/24/12. And it's a good time to actually have one.
As my face is getting worse! I need something, much better like maybe a medicine to take rather than a ointment to put.
It is hard living with Lupus and the psoriasis that is on my face and my scalp is not helping either. I know Lupus alone is hard to treat adding psoriasis makes it worse. Having two autoimmune disease at the same time?? Really???

Ugh. I just want my face to clear up. :( I can't just go shouting in the world that I have psoriasis so they would understand what I have on my face. People just tend to judge that I don't shower or stuff. I do shower! and I wash my freaking face!!!

:((

As time passes by...

The longer I am doing this medication, the more I forget to take it.

My doctor said I am looking better. And hopefully, my lab results wont be bad.
Problem that recently occurred after I went to the doctor is that my thumb and some parts of my fingers are soft and swollen, I don't know what is happening but luckily, I have an appointment with my dermatologist 2 weeks from  now. :) Hope all will be better then...

Ugh! Why do I have Lupus?!?

Healthy tastey whole grain breakfast!!

Latest news... :)

***Random Blabber***

Last Tuesday, I went to another doctor appointment. Although she really is not insisting of going on exercise more regular that I do, she said I am looking pretty good. :)

I gained a lot of weight, and no, I am not exaggerating... I went from my regular 145 lbs. (which is already heavy) to.. wait for it... 200 lbs!!! Freaking 200 lbs!!! Good lord! Even the nurse can't believe it. She said I don't look like I am 200! Which I think is good and bad at the same time...

Why good? Coz I don't look like I am 200 lbs. Why bad? Coz it means its not water weight... :(( I need to freaking exercise! Not just go to saunas and sweat!! LOL

Oh well.. I miss one of the lab appointment so there wasn't anything to talk about. the Respiratory test was all good. Nothing that tells me I am sick or something.. So that is Good. :)

 All is good. Still expecting the letter from the gynecologist so I could have my contraceptives. I don't think I would like to do that, but the doctors need that I have 0% chance of getting pregnant. Which is I guess fine. Oh well.. :(

Will be going to another dermatology appointment in a few weeks, so hopefully they could give me something for my face! my face is all bumpy and red!!! it sucks...

But the bottom line is, I am getting better and that's what counts!!

My weight problem..

I have been healthy, or I think I am for the past year. I could walk miles without feeling shortness of breath but lately I have been having a lot of those instances...

I think I gained too much weight, and I don't know what I need to do. I try not to eat as much but I always get hungry. My doctor said I need to exercise more, I try to walk as much as I can. I don't really have time or even money to go to the gym.. My god, call me cheap all you want but I am not paying 40 bucks a month. Lol. I have to many medical bills to think about before I think of more expenses.

I know, I know, I should think about more about my health, and spending $40 to make my health better is not really a problem. You know my problem really is, I need an exercise buddy, but everyone else is just to busy or doesn't really match my schedule.

Ugh! I also missed one of my lab exams since I totally forgot about it. I have been in too much "something". I don't even know what it was. If it's stress or something like that!

I got myself a puppy so I can walk her all the time, but it gets to dark early and I can't walk her by myself since where I live, it is dangerous to walk around just like that.

I need a life. LOL. A more active one that this. I just need something else to do in this city... Any ideas that i could do in this cement jungle I call Los Angeles? I can't be in a gym and get stuck with all the rest of the sweaty people...Oh well. I need to figure things out. Just to get myself in better health.

Wish me luck my loves. :D

My own version of a Heart Attack

Nasty!

Look what I found on the elevator yesterday?!?!

My baby... :)

:(

I decided to deactivate my Facebook account just so I don't start with all the drama.

I feel so unappreciated and uncared for. When I think I have done all I could to tell him I love him and I care for him and I will do whatever he want me to do for him. But I don't think he appreciates me or at least love me the same.

I am hurt. And sometimes, I think, I need to move on.

World meet Sable! :)

On the road..

this is all I saw when i got out of the los angeles area, starting from sun valley to palmdale...

Mountains, mountains, and mountains...

Friday the 13th!

I had a Friday the 13th curse for the first time in years.. maybe because it's my birthday after 2 days.. :)
Sucks! I got out of the house really early and when I went to my destination, I forgot my keys. So I have to go back and get my keys... so when i get back to where I am suppose to be, I am late... Oh well...

I got a good laugh though, to make my bad days.. :) I surfed 9gag.com .. you guys should check it out... :)

Who stole my cotton candy?!?

Papi stole some of my cotton candy... :) How can I get angry with that cute face... :D

Papi's birthday gift to me!!

Cotton candy maker!!! Weee!!!

Pershing Square, Los Angeles

One of my favorite corners in Los Angeles
606 Bldg, corner at 6th St and Hill St

Mama said I need new shoes...

But I like my old shoes! And still no holes on the soles, why buy new ones?!? Right?!?

My Birthday Wishlist

It's Tuesday, January 10 2012. :) You have 5 more days to buy me a gift. I don't want you to be all sad and depressed that you weren't able to get me one. So I am helping you right now. Here are a list of the things I want (as of the moment). I will make it so easy for you that I will even include the websites where it could be bought! Wahahaha! :) It's only once a year, so just give this chance to me, and no, giving me the chance is not a gift ok?!?

1. Wreck this Journal by Keri Smith - Already bought it. :) Papi gave me money!
2. Finish this Book by Keri Smith
3. What I Love About You by Kate & David Marshall
4. Clinique Redness Solutions Kit
5. Make-up Studio Blockbuster by Sephora
6. The Body Shop Aloe 4-piece Facial Skin Care Regime
7. Urban Decay Naked 2
8. Bare Minerals' Bare Escentuals Sephora Exclusive Get Started Kit in Medium
9. Cotton Candy Maker - another gift from Papi
10. Cake Pop Maker - this is the cheapest one, and isn't available right now at Kmart
11. Silk Screen Printe
12. Starbucks gift card - you could email it to jocx15@live.com :D it's ok if you only love me $5 worth..
13. More Pilot Petit pens and Inks - I think I have a pen addiction, I don't know why... I also would like to try this ink. 
14. a black book as a journal
15. and of course, gift cards are always welcome :) from near by places ok! I live by Downtown Los Angeles, not in the valley or orange county...

And there you have it, I hope I helped you with your dilemma! :) Will see if I have something on Saturday! Probably I will invite you.. if I know you that is.. :)

FEW MORE DAYS TILL BDAY!!! :)

Simple Beauty

A potted plant that is owned by one of the neighbors...

Yellow...

The yellow-y hue caused by the lamp makes the tree look, I don't know, like art?!? :)
I think it's beautiful so I took a picture of it...

NoHo Metro Station 010812

While waiting for my Bf's cousin.. Weird tile design on the metro station, beautiful scenery, and questionable people :) this is why I like Los Angeles! It's just fun and random!!!

NoHo trip...

Upper right: Omar with his sexy bikes
Upper left: Skye
Bottom left:: weird tile art at the train station
Bottom center: chapstick
Bottom right: Chapstick in my backpack

will be posting photo's of my random life soon, i will just double post it from tumblr, to ad more color and fun in my blog.. :)

1 week...

I have been delayed for one week. And no, I don't think I am pregnant. But as a precausion I will be buying pregnancy test. 

So you ask why I ended up with this conclusion? It is very simple actually. I have done my research about Prednisone, about Lupus and the other drugs I drink.

What is Prednisone?

It is a steroid medicine, that suppress my overactive immune system, so I will be able to control my Lupus flare ups.

What is a Lupus flare up?

Well it comes out in different ways in people. I, for example, have facial rashes and joint pain. But for some, who have misjudge some of its symptoms and found it late, could have kidney failure at worst.

Why did I think I am not pregnant and not worrying about pregnancy?

It is a fact that Prednisone could affect your hormone level. And I am currently down to one pill a day of Prednisone after being on 3 to 2 and half, to 2 to 1 and half, for months. And during those months that I have a huge dosage of Prednisone I am down to 1. And I have been on one pill a day for only 2 weeks before my period. And I think this affected it. Before, I was, coincidentally, just about to have my period or was done for only a couple of days after my period that my hormone levels (i think) was able to cope with the change.

Since all of this are only my hunch, why, you ask, I am not worried that I not pregnant? For one reason. :)

I know when I had sex and the past holiday, I have none! No time and place, and very busy with the holiday preps and my boyfriend's sisters being in town. And those babies are quite a handful. Lovely little ladies who are such spoiled brats (in a very loving way) Such smartasses too!

For example, after getting a Monster High doll for Christmas.

T: (brushing the doll's hair for the first time) Oh no! My baby (the doll) has Lupus!! It's losing its hair!

I was mixed emotions on this one. I don't know if I should be annoyed coz they are making fun of my sickness, or laugh coz of the funny comment, or be happy coz at least they know what I have and is aware of why I lost my hair.

They are young, but sometimes it gives me heartaches when they ask why am I losing my hair? why do you have that on your face? will it go? I tried to explain but sometimes, it's a little bit hard for them to understand. They don't understand, like some other people, why the one that makes me sick, are the same ones that keep them healthy. Oh dear Lupus researchers, I do wish you well and tell me how this happened to me.

Maybe one day, they will... (fingers crossed) and I hope to see them.

Happy New Year!

Happy New Year my loves!! :)

Another year to battle this disease, that you and me both hate. But, we have to deal with it. We can't do anything anyway. Might as well, right?

So, for the last days I haven't done anything really, just hanging out with friends, normal daily activities. The thing I am quite uneasy of is I am not on time with my period. The reason might because I am down to 1 pill of prednisone. We all know that prednisone affects hormones, so hopefully, it is all that there is.

I do want to be pregnant, but not during this time, not during this flare up.

Someday, I will have my family and be happy with my family.

Lupus, I hate you. But then I have to live with you. Hohummm... Another year with lupus, another year to survive...